March 6, 2010

Happy 5 Months, Dreadies!

Posted by meli on Saturday, March 06, 2010 in | No comments
They're 5 months old now. Yippie!
Haven't had the happiest of times with them over the past month ( I usually start off saying this?), but they're still here, so that says something! lol.

Truth is, I love them. I really really love them.
Sometimes that love only encompasses the *idea* of them, but it's still love, and that works for me.
It keeps me from letting my frustration take over, and giving up.
For valid yet irrational reasons that need a blog post all to itself, I see myself as such a weak quitter. This negative self talk is destructive. And it can lead me to do destructive things. The fact that I love, love, love the idea of my dreads is maybe what keeps me from acting out destructively when I'm frustrated with said dreads (though, as we've already discovered, several times in fact, most of my "dread frustration" is not at all about my hair, but instead of other aspects of my life that I am taking out on my hair. It's an easy target to blame shift onto).
My stubborn love over an *idea* is as good a reason as any when trying to overcome a difficult time.
I love them. I love having them.
I love watching the ebb and flow of their "lives". Each so different, yet so much the same.
Totally uncontrollable (I've tried!).


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